BUTT BLOG

COURTESY OF: Tyler Hereford

6.25.09
Vons, Fairfax and Pico

This butt was spotted and followed as it’s owner grabbed several (like 5) coupon newspaper inserts from the entrance to the store. The butt seemed to be on a shifted axis, as the cheeks moved in opposite directions of the hips. It appears the pockets are migrating away from the crack due to this phenomenon. It’s also hard to say just where this butt begins and where it ends, but I’m sure it must be less then 1.5 feet.

6.18.09

Americana & Central

Glendale, CA

This butt is the best butt for today’s outing.  Surprisingly, this is a dude’s butt.  The best traits about this butt are that it seems supple, soft, squeezable and smooth, yet at the same time appears firm and muscular.  This butt has a weird shape, almost like it was crafted in an amateur pottery class at a community college.  And if this butt couldn’t get any better, there is a surprise wedgie at the lower crack.

6.18.09

Americana & Central

Glendale, CA

This butt looks like an old person that just took their dentures out.  Gummy.  If this butt could talk, it would say, “Not the mama!”  This rectilinear posterior is most notably characterized by the horizontal cheek line that runs across the bottom.  Also, notice how the butt pooches out at either end of the cheek line, creating dimples.

6.18.09

Americana & Central

Glendale, CA

This is a good example of a clenched butt.  Notice how most of the fabric is gathered toward the lower crack; it is almost like a hungry hungry hippo for butts.  These wide and flappy cheeks allow for a lot of fabric to be hidden creating a wide crescent shape. Jenny thinks this butt is cute, Alex thinks it’s gross.

6.18.09

Americana & Central

Glendale, CA

There was opportunity in this butt as it bent down to pet a Squish, thus we were able to get an undies shot, plus a regular butt shot, hence, our diptych. This butt is comfortable in its shape and fearless of tight jeans. This butt is not too big, not too small and the cheeks are nicely proportioned to the supporting legs which is reflected by how they’re cradled in denim. We like this butt a lot. However, we aren’t fans of the undies even though they coordinate with her shoes.  Whatever is in the right butt pocket is a mystery to us, but we hope it’s a candy bar. What do you think?

6.15.09

Wilshire & Vermont

Korea Town, Los Angeles, CA

This dude is a sports fanatic.  The Lakers just won the 2009 championship and this guy is stoked. This butt is particularly multi-layered and is the reason for this post. Be aware of the gym pants atop basketball shorts atop plaid boxer shorts. This butt is impatient. This is apparent because he’s putting most of his weight to his left side as if he’s walking butt he is only just prepared for such action. This butt is also impatient because the clothing hasn’t been fully pulled-up and adjusted. Notice the open pocket—there is obviously no wallet in there which suggests how he is a careless, free American. Admittedly, there isn’t much to this butt, butt you can perceive much about this person from the appearance of the butt alone.

6.15.09

Wilshire & Vermont

Korea Town, Los Angeles, CA

The finer points of this butt are that it is trying HARD to be sexy; take in the see-through hi-lighter pink blouse, perforated white belt, intentionally worn pockets, and bikini-cut panties hidden within the crack instead of cradling the cheeks as is their main purpose. This butt is obviously short.  You can tell this by the perfect horizontal bunching of fabric below the right butt-flap.  If you look extremely closely you’ll notice the stain between the previously mentioned horizontal bunching and right butt-flap crease.  To sum everything up, this butt is trying too hard and should try to feel more comfortable in it’s shape.

6.15.09

Vermont & Wilshire

Korea Town, Los Angeles, CA

We selected this particular butt because it is a prime example of everything you shouldn’t want in a butt. First, this is a flat butt! There is so much flatness that excess fabric can be seen at the bottom of the right cheek—it folds out, instead of being hidden under butt-flap. Secondly, are the single welt pockets. With such a flat butt, these should not be stretched. However, this individual either has back fat or extremely square hips that would cause this. In addition, there is a horizontal line that spans from far left cheek to far right. It is hardly noticeable, butt it seems that she is wearing very low-rise undies, lower than befits her age/shape.

6.15.09

1st & New Hampshire

Korea Town, Los Angeles, CA

Green stretch cotton pants worn by, unfortunately, a youth (good job U.S.A.). Due to the material and lack of pockets, these could pass as pajama pants, however, this was taken mid-afternoon. The most interesting trait on this butt is that it could be mistaken for a poochy front butt of a middle-aged to old woman; a woman that probably had a child at some point. This is emphasized by the rippling fabric and the way all the contours create a gravitational effect toward the bottom of the butt crack seam. One other notable peculiarity, is the bunched undies beneath the pants, noticeable just below the sweatshirt and crossing the seam from cheek to cheek.

6.15.09

Wilshire & Vermont

Korea Town, Los Angeles, CA

Our first example is of a rotund butt. Not large, butt definitely rounded. We selected this butt for a few reasons. Notice the subtle hint of panty-line across the left cheek and the vanishing of denim beneath right butt-flap. One other distinct characteristic is the distressed fabric between the right pocket and the butt crack crease.